First Things First

“Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke?”(Isaiah 58:6, NIV)

Going into January 2018, things didn’t look much different from 2017, or even the year before that, or the year before that. It had been years now. I had not lost count.  Many of my big prayers had not been answered for almost a decade now: husband…children…family.

My church has a fast every year in January to bring in the New Year right. We started ours a couple of weeks into the month. And to be honest, even though I expected this fast every year, I had not thought much about this one.

I had joined two prayer groups just the semester before and had gotten an army of people behind my prayers.  I know they prayed for me; they had the heart for it.

Close friends of mine at church asked what I was doing for my fast. Some were doing the Daniel fast, fasting Netflix, fasting social media, and one friend decided to fast Mountain Dew! I thought maybe I would fast social media myself as I had done that fast before for good reason or should I say reasons even. That fast turned into a four year fast, a surprise to me! I had eliminated a time-stealer and uncluttered my mind with other people’s problems that they would post.  I needed to be less distracted, and that worked for me then.

Fasting something like social media I knew wasn’t the appropriate fast for me this time. That Sunday after church, I searched my heart for what it was I needed to fast. I remembered the “True Fasting” chapter in the book of Isaiah, chapter 58. I turned to it and read.

There I was at sunset with Bible open that evening when our church-wide fast would begin. This is the Scripture that resonated with me, and my heart wouldn’t let go of it:

“Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:
to loose the chains of injustice
and untie the cords of the yoke,
to set the oppressed free
and break every yoke?” (Isaiah 58:6, NIV)

The Amplified version reads like this:

“To undo the bonds of wickedness,
To tear to pieces the ropes of the yoke,
To let the oppressed go free
And break apart every [enslaving] yoke?”  (Isaiah 58:6, AMP)

This became the focus of my fasting: not for a husband, children, or family. I needed to be free of the negativity that had come with all of my unanswered prayers.

This Isaiah passage during my fast would prove my victory and freedom. I was the prisoner that needed to be set free. I was chained to wrong thoughts about myself and even wrong thoughts about how God felt about me.  I had decided that I would fast negative thoughts and feelings about myself. I felt like I was in a frontal attack from the devil. So I “fasted” all of my negative thoughts for God’s thoughts about me, His redemption over me, and His blood and sacrifice of love for me.

Still in the early stages of my fast, I received a text from a church friend that she was specifically praying for me during our fast. I briefly shared my struggle, and the fact that, that morning I was heavy-hearted and that I had already asked God for help. I admitted that I did not feel strong enough to break the cycle of wrong thoughts, yet knowing His power was strong in my weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9-10, NIV).

I did not feel like a victor or an overcomer. To me, I fell so short of His image that I bear!  

How had I gotten here in my walk of faith? I had grown tired and weary in my prayers.  It was more readily evident what the problem was, but when you feel stuck, it seems much harder to know how to get out of the mess!

I had two motivations here. One was to be free. The second was to be an effective minister to others. This was my part in this partnership with God for change:

“If you do away with the yoke of oppression,
with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry
and satisfy the needs of the oppressed…” (Isaiah 58:9b-10a, NIV)

With an if, there is always a then in Scripture, that is if we will do our part, He is faithful to do His part. So if I could not do away with the bondage in my own life first, how as a minister for His gospel and kingdom, could I help someone else in my same situation? I had to do away with the pointing finger I was pointing at myself and the malicious broken-record running through my own mind that I was not what I needed to be.  I am convinced as Christians that we have the right tools but don’t know how to use them. People are hungry for freedom but don’t know how to get it.  As the Scripture here may point to bodily and physical hunger, don’t we hunger spiritually as well?  We lack the sense to wield the tools we have into action in order to create the power needed to be that overcomer in Christ.  It takes effort and work.   

It may sound elementary and simple, replacing my thoughts for God’s thoughts about myself. When I thought of a fast that way for me at that time, it made me intentional to do something about the thoughts that were wrong!  It was VERY hard at the beginning, but I had formed a habit, and it became habitual.

With the if part of this Scripture, next comes the promise that follows, which God fulfills along with our intentional, deliberate effort:

“…then your light will rise in the darkness,
and your night will become like the noonday.
The Lord will guide you always;
He will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
like a spring whose waters never fail.
Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins
and will raise up the age-old foundations;
you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls,
Restorer of Streets with Dwellings.” (Isaiah 58:10b-12, NIV)

As I continue to keep close watch for thoughts that stray away from His thoughts and His love for me, there has been victory.  My night has turned into noonday; light has shone in the dark place of waiting.  I am strengthened and satisfied in my sun-scorched land of unanswered prayers. I am healed from brokenness, repaired and restored with joy.  Now I am ready to help someone else from where I was to where I am now.  I turned to Him when the negative thoughts came. I turned to Him when I needed help. And I exchanged my negative thoughts for His truth. Praise God for His marvelous work in, through, and over us. He accomplishes it and will complete the work He started in us (Philippians 1:6, NIV).

Photo by Ben White on Unsplash